5 weeks remain in the semester and it feels like it can't come soon enough. The didactic year has been demanding in ways I never imagined. I've written about the toll it has had on my family life and to some extent it has had on my psyche. I've wondered out loud to my classmates if we'll look back on this time with any nostalgia or fondness. None of them seem to think we will. I don't know, but I think it is possible. One of our intructors likend it to childbirth and the amnesia that goes along with it, ensuring that women don't quit having kids after the first one. I will miss my time spent with classmates and the camaraderie we have built through our shared struggles. Most have not experienced the the problems I have, yet I dont see my classmates who would easily or freely admit to struggling in anything.
Some of my single classmates have made this time little more than an extension of their undergraduate studies and therefore have little problem going out several times a week and partying on the weekend. It seems to work fine for them, and at times I am envious at their lack of apparent effort or stress; I couldn't do what they do and get away with it. I do wish that my wife were interested/involved in my studies. She hasn't helped me study for a single test and seems at times confused and dismayed as to why I would want to spend my professional life peering into strangers orifices, not to mention the requisite physical contact of exams.
But it is what it is and I am almost done. I have worked my tail off and have gotten good grades and evaluations. I made some good friends and tested myself under some difficult scenarios. It hasn't been perfect and I have made some mistakes. At times it was all I could do to keep from defenestrating myself, other times I had a ball doing and learning and trying. 5 more weeks of class. It feels like I just started yesterday. It feels like it's been forever.
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